I’ve got all these old magazines, newspapers, pamphlets, fliers, journals in my archives. I dreamt of having all these articles mentioning me when I was a kid. I saved it all. Boxes of yellowing paper, some slick glossies, lots of stuff.
There are five or six boxes in the garage. And I just started throwing it all out. This was not an act of self-destruction, no, but I did have to “check” myself in regards to what I was doing. Why was I doing this? Well the main reason is we just don’t have the space for boxes overflowing with print magazines. It is just hoarding trash at this point. That isn’t a sign of defeat. That is not giving up on my youthful vision of establishing a legacy. It feels awkward to have lugged some of this shit around for three decades and to then just toss it this late in the game.
But it dawned on me. If this vaunted dream of my youth is to mean anything, shouldn’t it mean that it will be worth a researcher’s time to track it all down? Either you are worth them doing the research on or all the articles you saved were just a form of flattery. So There it all goes, into the dumpster, you gotta roll the dice with or without the rationalizations.